24 May Saturday Night in the Big City
Saturday night. Destination CVS (to pick-up hormone prescription) and then onto Barnes & Noble.
There may have been a time when I felt like I had to apologize for this or make excuses. But, no need. Reinvention doesn’t always mean reinventing the outside. Sometimes reinvention is about change from the inside…about getting to know and like what’s already there…without excuses.
What I discovered is that I like Saturday night. I like taking back my life.
I like myself with no makeup and glasses and leggings and a wool scarf. It is always cold in Chicago.
I like what I see. The best part of having no car in a big city is the walking. I don’t have a Fitbit, but my smartphone tells me I average over the 10,000 steps a day goal. If I choose to eat ice cream for dinner tonight I can eat happier knowing I got my steps in.
I like being aware. I like the tourists in brand new Cubs t-shirts and the city people in a hurry.
I like not being in a hurry. It is a beautiful Saturday night…no agenda…no schedule…no kids…no chatter…no sorrow.
I have sat at home on many (far too many) Saturday nights…trying to binge watch TV…trying to read or write or act busy. But on this Saturday night I feel less burdened by expectation and more invigorated by just “being.”
I love the life I have chosen. I am grateful for the time to meander around Barnes & Noble. I love book stores. I actually need go no further than the magazine section. But, of course, because I am still a work in progress, I have to wander into the self-help section…and there on that shelf sits a Lauren classic:
“WHAT I KNOW FOR SURE” by Oprah Winfrey.
I picked it up and starting thumbing through it for old times’ sake. Weirdly my finger landed on page 45…the chapter ironically is called “Resilience.” So I offer up these Oprah words of wisdom for a Saturday night:
“As I get older, I can feel my body making a shift. No matter how I try, I can’t run as fast as I could before, but to tell you the truth, I don’t really care to. Everything’s shifting: breasts and knees and attitude. I marvel at my own sense of calm now. Events that used to leave me reeling, with my head in a bag of chips, no longer even faze me. Even better, I’m privy to insights about myself that only a lifetime of learning can bring.”
Well said, my friend Oprah. It is as if she was next to me in Barnes & Noble. I bought the book because somehow my original copy never made the move. (Besides I had to buy something. I was in the store for over an hour!)
Oprah and I left the store and skipped down the street to have dinner at Chipotle. (Sorry Oprah, I am still reeling my day in with a bag of chips…but it’s an active choice.)
If you’re lucky enough, sometimes you can have full order of wisdom along with that side of chips.
If you’re lucky enough, sometimes you sit still long enough to know you are your best date on a Saturday night.